Review: Me & My Menopausal Vagina By Jane Lewis

As women, many of us suffer from annoying vaginal problems from time to time.  These seem to increase with age, culminating in a veritable cornucopia of symptoms by the time you arrive at your menopausal years.

vaginal atrophy - woman looking out to sea whilst standing on rocks

Having written previously about challenges with Vulvodynia and Bartholin’s Cysts, I have often written about the woeful state of gynaecological advice many women receive from their doctors.  This tends to range from “pull yourself together” to “it’s only to be expected at your age” and of course the one I am thinking of having printed on a t-shirt “stick a bit of cream on it”.

Imagine then the pain and distress of having to live with Vaginal Atrophy – think of it like extreme vaginal dryness which gives the sufferer pain that is hard to numb, hard to cope with and impossible to ignore.

Vaginal atrophy (atrophic vaginitis) is thinning, drying and inflammation of the vaginal walls due to your body having less estrogen.

Sex is agony, wearing knickers hurts and even walking causes discomfort.  For many women, vaginal atrophy not only makes intercourse painful, but it also leads to distressing urinary symptoms. It is not a problem many of us would feel comfortable talking about to our nearest and dearest, let alone to our wider social circle.

Like any chronic condition, the challenge is not just physical.  It is the mental dissolving of what was once a stalwart and happy constitution.  The questioning of how one small part of your body can come to literally rule your life.

It can feel as if there is nowhere to turn.  No answers.  No support. Just unending discomfort which nags you at every turn.

What a comfort and a relief, then, to find this marvellous book by Jane Lewis – “Me & My Menopausal Vagina”.  On first picking it up you might think that it will be a dry (if you’ll pardon the pun) read about this medical condition, but actually, it is an open, honest and quite a life-affirming read which pulls no punches and yet manages to offer hope at the same time.

Me & My Menopausal Vagina is one woman’s journey of menopause and vaginal atrophy. It was written in collaboration with her daughter, Penny, in a tongue-in-cheek way to help break taboos of vaginal atrophy

For a start, Jane talks you through the various nooks and crannies of your vagina.  You’ll think you’ll know what goes where, so to speak but can you be precise?  It’s important because if you can’t explain where your pain is, it will be more difficult to get the correct help and treatment.

Jane shares her experience of vaginal atrophy and talks about HRT and other treatments.  She acknowledges the effect that VA can have on your mental health and offers suggestions as to how to talk to your nearest and dearest about this condition.  There is also a very helpful chapter on maintaining some sort of sex life.

If you have vaginal atrophy the last thing you feel like doing is having sex but how guilty does that make a woman feel?  And how difficult is it to get your partner to understand that any pleasure has been replaced with painful burning, chafing and even bleeding?

Jane also shares her daily routine for minimising her discomfort and the products that have worked for her.  I have to say I have already discovered the fabulous Yes company with their range of organic vaginal moisturisers and lubricants and I heartily recommend you check them out.

It’s particularly important to understand vaginal atrophy so that we can help our daughters when they, in later life, may suffer the same problems. And of course, there is no reason why our sons shouldn’t be educated about VA so that they can offer support if needed.

One thing is certain.  Vaginal Atrophy needs to be talked about far more openly and long-term treatments need to be advanced.  As Jane says, topical oestrogen products like Ovestin tend to be prescribed on a short-term basis when they should really be offered on a longer basis.

Like me, Jane is conflicted about HRT although she mentions the famous piece of research which links HRT to an increased risk of breast cancer.  That research has, it appears, been largely discredited but the decision to take HRT is an incredibly personal one and the patient needs to weigh up the benefits against the risks. In Jane’s case, she felt that she could not not take it.  I am not quite there yet.

Me & My Menopausal Vagina reads like a chat with a good friend who tells it like it is and doesn’t pull any punches.  Jane says, openly and honestly, that she will always have this condition but much more needs to be done.

If you have started to notice discomfort or dryness down below then pick up this book.  Arm yourself with all the information and then go and see your GP.

You may be horrified to find how behind the times some of them are.  I recently asked about bio-identical HRT and the answer I got was “oh, I don’t really know about that.  You’ll need to go to a menopause clinic and the nearest one is Bristol”.  I’m in the Vale of Glamorgan.

Something really needs to be done because there must be thousands of us suffering and, as Jane says, what happens to all the older ladies in care homes or living on their own.  Many of them will still be suffering the effects of conditions like this.  Who is helping them?

Think of it like this.  If a man went to the doctor with a split, burning, bleeding penis, would he be told to put some cream on it and consult someone 40 miles away? Would he be told it’s just his age and one of those things?  Would he be told it’s all in his mind?


When you suffer from a chronic condition like Vaginal Atrophy (or Tinnitus or Fibromyalgia) – which seems to vanish to the back of the medical priority pile when it comes to diagnosis, there are some books you return to again and again for their wise words.  And because they give you comfort.

This is one of them.

You can find the book on Jane’s website or on Amazon.

You can also connect with Jane on Twitter @mymenopausalvag and Facebook @My Menopausal Vag.



  1. A
    5 March, 2023 / 8:22 pm

    Finding an ob/gyn who has specialized training in menopause is the first thing. I went through early menopause and now, years into it at 49 I’m discovering the fun of VA. Turns out less than 10% of doctors get any specialized training in menopause, including gynos, which means all the know how to do is push hormones on women, many which increase the risk of breast cancer or are literally made through animal cruelty (like Premarin which is made from the urine of pregnant mares who are confined in small spaces, forced to be repeatedly pregnant for life then sent to the butcher). Or the naturopaths who have even less experience and just try to see supplements and creams with no medical evidence of efficacy. It’s a sh8tshow out there…and the word “atrophy” certainly doesn’t help as it should be more like “knives going up me when I get on my bike…”

    • Ann Marie Shannon
      9 October, 2023 / 1:46 am

      Exactly!!!!!!! I’ve always described having sex as knives were being inserted..then my male gyno said, well, your productive years are over- tell your husband no more sex..uhh

  2. Suzette
    12 April, 2021 / 8:15 am

    Am getting problem also at this section, I need your guidance and lesson from you

    • linda
      12 April, 2021 / 12:02 pm

      Hi Suzette what is it you would like to know?

  3. Beth shields
    15 October, 2018 / 8:59 am

    I suffer from this awful condition, and it was only by chance a doctor happened to tell me what I had ( I’m 63! ) I thought I had a never ending uti. I will be reading this book for sure .

    • Loey Simpson
      29 December, 2023 / 5:48 pm

      I’m excited to have stumbled upon someone that feels my pain
      I was in my prim when i suddenly had to get ALL my female parts removed. It has ruined my life.

      Hairloss, weight gain, no sex drive, dry skin ,, mood swings

      I’m 54 now it’s not pretty!

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